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Gratitude Practices

Daily Gratitude Journaling

Gratitude journaling is one of the most popular gratitude practices because of its simplicity. Gratitude journaling helps you notice and appreciate what’s good in your life and increases your ability to store and recall positive memories.

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Each day, list 1-3 things/events/people you’re grateful for or grateful to. Use this prompt:

 

The word “because” prompts you to explain why you’re grateful. In so doing, you deepen your appreciation for the thing, event, or person you’re grateful for.

 

Use a gratitude journaling app, a private blog, or a physical journal. The choice is yours.

 

To build a daily habit of gratitude journaling, pair this new habit with an existing daily habit (e.g., drinking coffee in the morning). Strive to write at the same time every day.

 

Are you feeling stuck or wanting new ideas for what to write about? Here are a few tips:

  1. Use this list of 130 prompts to help you generate ideas on what to write about.

  2. Look at your calendar of events over the past week. What happened for which you can be grateful?

Group-Based Gratitude Journaling

Gratitude journaling works better when it’s done in a group because it provides social accountability (a bit of healthy peer pressure) and inspiration from others when you feel stuck and don’t know what to write. It also fosters a sense of connection with others. Do it with a group of family members, friends, or colleagues. We recommend a group no larger than 10 people. Commit to journaling together for a specific duration (e.g., 1 month).

 

There are many online platforms for group-based journaling, but the simplest, free platform we’ve tried that works really well is Google Sheets. Here's a Google Sheets template for group-based gratitude journaling.

Gratitude Journaling On Specific Topics

The following are one-time journaling activities. Aim to spend about 20 minutes on each journaling activity. In contrast to daily gratitude journaling, write in a narrative rather than a list format. Don’t worry about grammar and spelling when you write. You’re writing for yourself, and no one is going to judge you for what or how you write.

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1. Gratitude Density Journaling

 

Pick a memorable event in your life for which you’re grateful. Perhaps you just returned from an enjoyable vacation, or you recently had a positive experience at work or school. You could also write about an event that happened long ago. Write about why you’re grateful for this event. Describe as many aspects of the event or as many reasons as possible that explain why you’re grateful. Feel free to include photographs of the event in your journal. Gratitude density journaling helps you deepen your experience of gratitude and provides a useful record of a memorable event that will contribute to your memory bank of grateful experiences.

 

2. Redemptive Gratitude Journaling

 

This activity is useful when you want to make sense of a stressful experience from the lens of gratitude.  Recall one of the most stressful and upsetting experiences in your entire life. This should be an event that happened in the past rather than a current event.

Sometimes, a very stressful experience might result in positive outcomes in our lives, for which you can now be grateful. Write about the positive outcomes related to your very stressful experience for which you can now be grateful.  

To guide you in your writing, we’ve provided a list of 10 opportunities for gratitude that might arise from very stressful situations. Before you write, please read the following list on the next few pages carefully. Not all these opportunities might apply to you, but we encourage you to address at least one or more of them in your writing. 

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  1. Closed door/open window: The stressful experience led to a positive outcome (e.g., a new opportunity), for which you’re now grateful. 

  2. Changing your priorities: You’re grateful that this stressful experience motivated you to live your life more fully. You changed your priorities to pursue what is truly important.

  3. Precious goodness: You no longer take the positive things in your life for granted.  If you’ve lost something, you also become more grateful for what you didn’t lose.

  4. Resilience and growth: You’re grateful that this stressful experience made you more resilient or that you developed character strengths because of this stressful experience. Some character strengths (e.g., humility, patience, and forgiveness) are best nurtured through adversity.

  5. Insights and wisdom: You’re grateful that you learned a lesson or gained new insights about yourself, others, or the world because of this stressful experience. You are now wiser.

  6. Deeper relationships: You’re grateful for the support you received from others, or the stressful experience enabled you to develop deeper relationships with others, for which you’re grateful.

  7. Compassion: You’re grateful that the stressful experience has made you more compassionate toward others who are suffering and, as a result, you’re more engaged in efforts to help others.

  8. Spirituality: Because of this stressful experience, you became more spiritual or religious. You’re grateful to God or a higher power.

  9. Avoidance of disaster: Although this experience was stressful, you’re grateful that you averted a potentially disastrous or even deadly outcome. 

  10. Relief from suffering: You’re grateful that you experienced relief from suffering, and that your life is now better than before.  

 

3. Gratitude Peak Experiences Journaling 

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Think of one of the most grateful moments in your entire life. This would be a moment in which you felt intensely grateful.  We’ll call this your gratitude peak experience. Write about what happened that triggered your experience of intense gratitude. Try to imagine yourself at that moment. Describe the incident and your experience of intense gratitude in as much detail as possible. Include your feelings and thoughts that were present at the time.

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4. Gratitude Turning Point Journaling

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Write about a positive turning point in your life that happened at least 12 months ago, with a focus on what you’re grateful for and to whom you’re grateful. A turning point is an important event or experience that led to significant and long-term changes in your life; the event or experience itself might have been positive, neutral, negative, or seemingly random, but what makes it a positive turning point is that it led to significant, long-term positive outcomes in your life. Examples of positive turning points include a new opportunity in your life, a new relationship or friendship, moving to a new location, a situation that led to a positive change in your values or spirituality, or a stressful experience that resulted in a positive outcome.

As you write about your positive turning point, feel free to use some of the following additional prompts as a guide.

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1.         As you think about the events surrounding your positive turning point(s), try to recall who was helpful to you. If you could go back in time to thank the person(s) who helped you, what would you say to each of them? 

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2.         How has the positive turning point(s) in your life positively changed you as a person (e.g., your identity, beliefs, attitudes, behaviors, and/or the way you relate to other people)? Consider what you’re grateful for and to whom you’re grateful.

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3.         Based on your positive turning point reflections, what did you learn about yourself or your life? Consider what you’re grateful for and to whom you’re grateful. 

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4.         Sometimes, we don’t realize the full impact of a positive turning point until much later. If you were to go back in time to “talk” to yourself at the time of the positive turning point(s), what would you say to explain why you’re now grateful for this turning point(s)?

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5.         As you reflect on your positive turning point(s) and its subsequent effects on your life, what would be a theme or main idea that addresses what you’re most grateful for? 

Gratitude Walk

This activity will help you savor the beauty of your day-to-day environments and experience gratitude for the surroundings that we tend to take for granted. Take a stroll in your neighborhood or a park. Your goal is to slow down, pause, observe, and appreciate something beautiful or interesting in your environment that you’ve taken for granted or not previously noticed. For example, you might want to spend a few minutes observing a tree that you walk by regularly. Be on the lookout for beauty and novelty. Be open to being pleasantly surprised. Take time to experience gratitude for what you observe.

Gratitude Meditation

Gratitude meditation helps you slow down and stay centered. This activity should be done in a quiet place free from distractions. This activity could be meaningful for people who already practice or who enjoy meditation or other contemplative practices.

 

Here're two versions of a gratitude affirmation you could meditate on daily. The first version is for people who believe in God or a higher power and could be expressed as a prayer, while the second is a secular version. Say the following words slowly to yourself. Let the words sink in and allow them to resonate deeply within you. You may choose to repeat them several times (e.g., 3 times).

 

Spiritual version:

Today, open my eyes, so that I may notice your gifts in my life.

Today, open my heart, so that I may appreciate your gifts.

Today, open my mind, so that I may remember and recall your gifts in my life.

Today, open my lips, so that I may proclaim the goodness of your gifts in my life.

 

Secular version:

Today, may my eyes be open to notice the gifts in my life.

Today, may my heart be open to appreciate the gifts in my life.

Today, may my mind be open to remember and recall the gifts in my life.

Today, may my lips be open to proclaim the goodness of the gifts in my life.

Gratitude Letter

Writing a gratitude letter could be one of the best ways to increase your feelings of gratitude. Gratitude letter writers tend to feel grateful during and after writing the letter. Writing a gratitude letter could also increase your sense of connection to the recipient you’re writing to and may strengthen your relationship with the recipient. However, the most important reason to write a gratitude letter is not to feel good but to thank your recipient and to let them know that they matter to you. The late researcher Chris Peterson once said: “Other people matter. But few of them are mind readers. Let them know that they matter. They might benefit. And you certainly will.” Indeed, research suggests that most recipients appreciate receiving a gratitude letter and tend to respond positively to the letter writer. 

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Here’s what to do: Write a letter to express gratitude to someone in your life who has contributed positively to your life and whom you have not properly thanked. Examples include family members, partners, friends, or colleagues. Your letter should be addressed directly to the person to whom you are grateful. We also strongly encourage you to send (via snail mail or email) the letter to the recipient as soon as possible. You could also consider meeting the recipient and reading the letter to them if you believe this would be meaningful to both of you. You may type or hand write your letter – it’s up to you.

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Tips on gratitude letter writing:

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  1. Don’t select as the recipient of your letter a person from whom you’re attempting to obtain a benefit (e.g., you’re hoping to reconcile with an ex-partner). The sole motive for writing the letter should be to express gratitude to the recipient of the letter. 

  2. The best people to write to are those who have had a long-term positive influence on your life.

  3. Do select a real, living person whom you personally know as the recipient of your gratitude letter (not a historical or fictional character or someone you admire but don’t know personally).

  4. Don’t include anything negative about the recipient in your letter. If you have mixed feelings about your intended recipient, and it’s difficult for you to be authentic without disclosing some of your negative feelings toward this person, it’s best to select another recipient for your gratitude letter.

  5. What to include in your letter: Use the following acronym CABRAISE to guide the content of your writing. (In the description below, “benefactor” refers to the recipient of your letter.) Although it’s not necessary to include every component in the CABRAISE acronym, try to include at least 1 or 2 of them.

    1. Cost incurred by the benefactor (e.g., your benefactor incurred time, money, or resources to help you).

    2. Attitude of the benefactor (e.g., your benefactor genuinely desired to help you without complaining).

    3. Benefit you received (what you enjoy about the gift or help conferred by your benefactor).

    4. Rarity of the benefactor’s actions (e.g., your benefactor’s actions were rare compared to what others typically do).

    5. Admiration – what you admire about the benefactor (what you admire about your benefactor’s character as reflected in their actions, e.g., they are kind or generous).

    6. Influence – long-term impact of the benefactor’s action on you

    7. Stories or specific examples of the benefactor’s actions

    8. Effort exerted by the benefactor

Gratitude Note

Write a brief gratitude note to someone who has benefited you recently. This note could be about 1-2 sentences but should be longer than a simple “thanks” or “thank you.” Your gratitude note could be handwritten or sent in an email, text message, or a social media post. In your gratitude note, try to acknowledge at least one of the following:

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  1. Attitude of the benefactor (e.g., your benefactor genuinely desired to help you without complaining).

  2. Benefit you received (what you enjoy about the gift or help conferred by your benefactor).

  3. Cost incurred by the benefactor (e.g., your benefactor incurred time, money, or resources to help you).

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Strive to write at least one gratitude note to someone each week.

Oral Expression of Gratitude

Orally express heartfelt gratitude to someone who has benefited you recently. What you say need not be elaborate but it should be longer than a simple “thanks” or “thank you.” In your gratitude expression, try to acknowledge at least one of the following:

  1. Attitude of the benefactor (e.g., your benefactor genuinely desired to help you without complaining).

  2. Benefit you received (what you enjoy about the gift or help conferred by your benefactor).

  3. Cost incurred by the benefactor (e.g., your benefactor incurred time, money, or resources to help you).

Strive to do so at least once a week. 

Behavioral Gratitude

Behavioral gratitude is a non-verbal, action-based expression of gratitude to someone who has benefited you. Behavioral gratitude offers a tangible way to reciprocate your benefactor. The following are some examples of what you can do:

  1. Buy this person a gift.

  2. Perform an act of service for this person.

  3. Spend quality time doing something meaningful with this person.  

  4. Show this person physical affection.

The more you get to know a person, the better your sense of which of these activities would be most meaningful to them.

Gratitude Sharing

The act of disclosing what we’re grateful for to another person and listening to someone else share their experience of gratitude fosters greater social connectedness and deepens our experience of gratitude. This activity is best practiced with a partner, family members, or close friends with whom you meet regularly. Do this at least once a week or every day if it’s feasible. This simple 5-minute activity could also be paired with daily gratitude journaling.

Here's what to do: in a dyad or a small group, take turns sharing one thing, event, or person you’re grateful for or grateful to. Strive to be a good listener when someone else is sharing their gratitude experiences. Here’s how to be a good listener.

  1. Listen intently (e.g., show eye contact and use head nods)

  2. Express curiosity by asking questions

  3. Don’t interrupt them when the other person is talking

  4. Validate their gratitude experience (e.g., I’m so happy for you!)

  5. Tell them what you learned from their gratitude experience (e.g., Thank you for sharing your experience. It had never occurred to me to be grateful for the ability to run. I’ve learned so much from you!)

Honor-Based Gratitude Activities

Honor-based gratitude activities are those that honor someone to whom you’re grateful but whom you’re not able to reciprocate, e.g., someone who is no longer living, someone with whom you’ve lost contact, God, or a higher power. The following are ways that you can honor your benefactor:

  1. Pay it forward – help others just as you’ve been helped by your benefactor.

  2. Donate to charitable causes connected to what your benefactor cares or cared about.

  3. Live a life worthy of your benefactor or model your life after your benefactor.

  4. Tell others about how your benefactor has positively impacted your life.

  5. Create or buy something that serves as a daily visual reminder of your benefactor’s goodness.

  6. Create or participate in a ritual to honor your benefactor.

Gratitude-Based Parenting Activities

Help your children deepen their experience of gratitude by using these questions.

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